THE NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION – HOW TO SUCCEED (ISSUE 159) DECEMBER 23, 2014

By Diane Gold

The New Year’s Resolution time of year is here, and our habit of setting one is age old. For this year, I’d like to offer a simple way to succeed that is easy, works for any goal and requires no self-esteem and no self-motivation.

HABITS

We all have habits, which are created from consistent repetition of the same action. We (1) get an urge by a trigger’s going off within (the urge to write music, eat, take drugs, swim) or we create our own trigger through external stimulation (leaving the running shoes next to our bed which triggers our putting them on and, possibly, some day, running in them which may trigger the urge to go out and show our newly exercised body off). Some habits add to our lives; others, take away more energy than they give.

THE NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION

There is a ritual of creating the New Year’s Resolution. This ritual is popular, so it turns into a habit by the very nature of peers questioning,

“What’s your New Year’s Resolution?”

Once upon a time, we set goals for ourselves whenever the time to do so was appropriate. Now, we do it as the calendar changes. So, we are peer pressured to have a resolution to announce to others and ourselves.
Motivating? Maybe, or this may just keep us in that box of doing things for others and neglecting ourselves. Unless we put the opinions, gossip, judgments of others in perspective, we may not live with honor to ourselves.

PEER PRESSURE – INTERNAL AND EXTERNAL

It is crucial to understand the difference between personally subscribing to peer pressure and externally accommodating the rules of peer pressure to be in harmony with society. We can decide that we, personally, do not put much value in the group ethic or what the group of peers is saying, or I may care about one group, and you may care about another. It’s important to act our truth. We may decide to act in a particular social manner so that peers can enjoy interacting with us and eventually understand our focus. We choose how far we compromise our ultimate truth, if, at all.

Example of peer pressure to look good:

Let’s say there are two kinds of clothing to wear, and, for today’s example, we don’t have the opportunity to make or obtain any other kind. One kind is stylish and looks runway-model-like. It is made from a combination of genetically modified cotton (which most of our cotton is) and a petroleum based fabric, polyester.

The other kind of clothing is made with sustainable bamboo that is more casual, is not genetically modified, is not sprayed with pesticides and whose crop replenishes at a rate faster than it is used.

(Note that genetic modification is completely different from plants sprayed with pesticide. Just because something is not sprayed does not mean its seeds were not genetically manipulated. And vice versa.)

People judge us. To that, we act from our own core values. Some people would immediately use the runway clothing because they would value looking stylish, glamorous and impeccably fashioned. I’m the first to say that dressing up can add happiness to the environment, stimulates the senses, makes the wearer feel exceptional and the wearer can get into more parties. I, personally, would like to look runway-model-like. But, more important to me (now, in my life) is my ability to educate about sustainability and genetic modification. So I would choose the bamboo clothes to send my message.

HOW TO SUCCEED (THE ACTION STEPS)

Whatever leads us to originate the New Year’s Resolution, we may choose this time of year to pull out a goal that feels right to us. Let’s look at the method for success:

1) PICK 1 TASK.

2) WRITE DOWN the very first action step you have to do to begin the task.

3) RESOLVE TO DO THAT TASK. Once this one step is completed, you will have completed your resolution. That’s it. Congrats.

EXAMPLE

Let’s say my giant task is to learn French. My resolution would be either to get a language book or find a course online. It would not include beginning the book or course, reading pages or producing sounds. Those would be tasks for another day.

CONCLUSION

We have discussed that our habit of setting a New Year’s Resolution may come from our habit of responding to peer pressure which may have come from our desire for recognition which may have been nurtured into us. So, looking right in front of us, without looking down the 5-year path or the 5-step path, concentrating on one step is all that matters.

Once we take that first step, we have succeeded. We may choose to take another. We like success, whether this has been nurtured into us or whether we like advancing society for its own sake. Taking 1 step allows us to complete our New Year’s Resolution entirely. If it is a worthy action, we may choose to repeat the 1 step process. The important thing is that we have set and achieved our New Year’s Resolution. Our future acts can be framed by this.

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DIANE GOLD, PUBLISHER AND AUTHOR

Diane Gold, Founder of Warriors of Weight, Turning Habits Into Health, is a mentor in tai chi, kung fu and meditation, a music, fitness and stress expert, dedicated mom, studying plant-based nutrition, peaceful conflict resolution and habit replacement.

She is happy to be here. She says,

“We all have amazing ideas. Often, around a new calendar year, we create a goal for ourselves. Often, we plan multiple steps and multiple goals. It’s true, we may very well succeed at these. However, a sure fire way to the finish line is to have a small scope from which to focus, similar to using a microscope or a telescope. Both these tools allow us to hone in on one piece of the whole. That’s the method. Do one simple step. This is success. If another step is needed to proceed, do it. At least, in doing so, we will begin to become an expert at taking 1 step, which is all that is important right now.

“Thank you for all your support for WarriorsOfWeight.com. May we consider a little more social justice this coming year and realize how royal we all are.

“Finally, let us all take extra good care of ourselves because we are so worth it!”

HABIT CHANGE: OUR NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION (ISSUE 110)

By Diane Gold

Habit change, New Year’s resolutions, success. That’s what we want. That’s what is possible. Whether we want a total make-over or a tiny change, now’s a motivating time to make it. This begins with a tiny plan, 1 step and repetition. Along with this, an inventory of our own personal foundation is in order.

OUR FOUNDATION

We, as humans, have a variety of requirements. To be at our best, we need a balanced infrastructure to support us. The simple version of this concept is that we need great nutrition, a little exercise, a way to be creative, love and companionship, daily relaxation, enough rest and a place to do this in. Each of us has a little bit different make-up and needs more or less in each of these areas, depending upon who we are.

GREAT NUTRITION – this means getting most of our enzymes, vitamins, minerals, phytonutrients from food, not supplements, with little or no pesticide present. Hard to do in an age where we use genetically modified seeds that live through toxic pesticide sprays so that we get maximize crop yield for maximum profit, without regard for the damage the sprays and the genetically engineered seed do to our bodies.

DAILY EXERCISE – this physical fitness can be anything from stretching to walking to climbing stairs to bicycle riding.

CREATIVITY – being creative can range from telling a joke to writing a letter to mixing an album. When we communicate with others in a way where we are expressing our own uniqueness, we are creating.

LOVE AND COMPANIONSHIP –

we are social creatures. Reaching others is truly important for us.

DAILY RELAXATION – although we see the need in others, sometimes we leave out this all important area of what’s necessary to keep us whole. We would never think of skipping our daily hygiene. In the same way, we need to keep our insides clean through some type of calming activity. Daily.

ADEQUATE REST – can anyone relate to having gotten too little rest? I start to fall apart most quickly without just the right amount of rest. And that makes sense, since we are like machines with electrical signals for our brain and our heart. We need to recharge ourselves regularly and completely to work well.

Sometimes, we take these beauties for granted. They are important to upkeep so that our habit change, New Year’s Resolution, whatever it is, will have a leg to stand on, so to speak.

THE NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION

No matter what we want to change, if our foundation is solid; we will do well. This means if we monitor our nutrition, exercise, creativity, companionship, relaxation and rest; we have a super chance of breezing through our task. Our New Year’s resolution may, in fact, be in one of the areas mentioned.

ONE-POINTED FOCUS

As with any goal, it’s important to apply one-pointed focus and go in one direction. Once 1 step is taken, then another comes. So often, we attempt 2 things at once before we have an understanding of one path. So nothing gets done because our attention is not exclusive. Here’s another factor that might help.

PERCEPTION

The way we perceive things makes the difference between bewilderment and understanding, collapse and success. There is only one small difference between the two. It’s our perception, whether we are victims or conquerers. When we realize that we are replacing a new and wonderful action in the place of the old action that we wish to change, we can focus on that new action and all its joys, rather than becoming victims who are depriving themselves of something.

If we have the capacity to think, we have the capacity to be our own heroes. Make sure to leave the victim mindset in a small box outside the door. There’s always opportunity to go get that box later. Leave it outside for the first 21 days of the habit change, and let’s see how that goes. It’s only 21 days. If it’s not necessary to get it after the first 21 days, leave it for another 21 days, etc., etc.

If we are not sure what that one New Year’s Resolution is going to be, here are several action steps that may help.

ACTION STEPS

1)   Write down 5 habits that you wish to change. (Don’t worry if you don’t have 5.)

2)   Next to each, write down a replacement action you could do in place of the action that is your habit. It can be fun, creative, unrelated, as long as it is immediate and available to you within 10 seconds of getting your original cue.

3)   Next to that column, on a scale of 1 to 10, write down how much you wish to change each.

4)   Use the 1 to 10 guide to decide which habit will be your New Year’s Resolution. Keep judgment out of it. This is for you, alone. If one is more pressing than others, but everyone thinks you should change another, go with your gut. It’s your New Year’s Resolution, and it’s your habit. And you know better than anyone else what it feels like inside you.

5)   Now that you have picked 1 of the 5 habits you have written down, decide whether the replacement action is accessible to you 24 hours a day. If it’s not, pick another one. If what you picked requires eating food, drinking water; make sure that you can carry the food and water with you at all times.

6)   Get ready to start by buying any food or bpa free water container you will need and preparing it now, since your plan starts January 1, 2014 for your Happy New Year.

SPECIAL EMPHASIS

The plan must be in place before you move a muscle so you will be ready when the cue (the trigger that makes you want to take the old action) shows up. That’s what 6) is all about.

7)   Tell a friend, storekeeper or some online social media connection about your decision. Keep talking about your resolution behavior on a regular basis. It will encourage follow through.

8)   Do it! You can, you know!

CONCLUSION

1 step at a time will get us changing whatever habit we choose. We can make a list. We can manage to have water or carrots with us all the time. We can go to a public grocery store or library and tell an employee there what we’re doing. The employee will listen. This declaration usually helps us stay on track.

Most important, though, is to be consistent with keeping up with the new behavior, and, if this involves food or drink, prepare it. We need to be ready so that the first time and the 100th time our body or brain tells us to act out the old habit, we are ready with the pre-planned all, new behavior.

To succeed at our New Year’s Resolution Habit Change, repetition is key. Whatever our new behavior, it must be repeated for a good 3-week period as a humble beginning. I just read an article saying how 21 days to change a habit is a myth, and 66 days is more realistic. If you’re like me, it can take 90-180 days to take hold, and repetition is still necessary on a daily basis after that.

Bottom line, a strong foundation is extremely helpful when changing a habit. It makes the efforts that will surely be difficult, a little less difficult and absolutely possible. Wish you an extra bit of energy for your resolution! Follow the steps and see if it works. We’re all together.

SPECIAL NOTE ABOUT MAX-NEEF’S HUMAN DEVELOPMENT MODEL

It should be noted that Alfred Manfred Max-Neef developed a more complicated, yet more complete, human development model which he based on fundamental human needs and discussed in his 1991 book, Human Scale Development. This model includes:

subsistence, protection, affection, understanding, participation, leisure, creation, identity, freedom. The reason I favor the simple version is it is more concrete at spelling out our needs. It is a lovely list that is worthy of thought.

New Year’s Resolution 3-Question Survey
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but don’t forget to read Diane Gold’s comments below!

FEEDBACK

We value your feedback very much.
Please leave  a comment below.

Please LIKE us on the website and at WarriorsOfWeight on Facebook. Thanks.

DIANE GOLD, AUTHOR

Diane Gold, Founder of Warriors of Weight, Turning Habits Into Health, is a mentor in tai chi, kung fu and meditation, a music, fitness and stress expert, dedicated mom, studying plant-based nutrition and habit change.

She believes we each succeed at our great New Year’s Resolution. She says,

“With a simple instruction of how to walk a path, the path does not have many holes. That’s because we are prepared for the holes when they arrive. In the same way, with a little planning and straight-ahead focus on our part, we can proceed with habit change and have a positive outcome. Rather than think about whether or not we can accomplish our task, let’s just do it. That is the way!

“Happy New Year! Be safe.”